I still have it, you know, the Christmas spirit! Not like they didn’t try to reap me out of it with all the drama and everything. I still want to decorate Christmas trees; I still want to hang lights around the house and little funny characters everywhere!!!  Some part of me is still a kid about those things. I want the magic again enough with all the drama. But the thing is, holidays come with traditions and the only ones I know about is that someone is always picking a fight or something.  So I’m not really closing the door on celebrations but for a while I guest that is going to be like this year. Me sitting on a beach drinking my self out just to forget. I still had fun but it was in a really weird kind of way. Maybe I should recreate some kind of family for my self that way instead of being thrown in with « wacky» people I will choose with whom I want to be with. So it could be a mix of family ( I got some of them a least) and friends who appriciate all this… Shouldn’t this be THE way?….I mean spending important time of the year together with the people that respect you and all??